Tag Archives: church

Acceptance Within the Church

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This article struck a cord in me. I was going to just link to it but I wanted to add my two cents.  I have heard it said, “I love church, but what is going on within the inner workings of church is what I do not like.”  I think I have said that a time or two also.  Church is filled with imperfect people, people who sin, people who need each other.  Unfortunately it is within the church walls that I hear more gossip, complaining, and not loving each other that bothers me the most.

“We carry our problems into the church the same way we carry them into a bar—they just react differently in each location. Unfortunately, the sins that exist within the walls of the Church are harder to spot.” (from the article) And when they are discovered often we hear of someone’s sins from several different sources.  What happened to keeping a confidence, what happened to being there to pray for a brother and sister and keeping your mouth shut? Often times we “are there for them,” it is the keeping our mouth shut we as Christians struggle with.   The only time you should feel the freedom to share something is with your pastor and the item better concern you in some way.  If you are just “informing” your pastor, that is gossip.

“It’s to our shame many folks looking for hope find more grace at the local bar than the local church.” (from the article) We look good on the outside, but as soon as we are at a “Christian” party or gathering, I can not tell you how often I have stood by and overheard conversations about other fellow church members.  It really makes me angry!!  Also it plants seeds of insecurity of turning to fellow church members during a time of need.  I am not standing on my soap box pointing fingers and saying I have never fallen into this sin, but sending out a reminder to fellow brothers and sisters.

“Walking the line between the clubs and the Church, I’ve been misunderstood by both sides. I’m sure you’ve felt the same thing: people throw rocks at the things they don’t understand. (AMEN)  But it hurts worst when it comes from well-intending brothers and sisters, the folks who are purportedly filled with the love of Christ. Our knee-jerk response is to retaliate, to fight back. And the cycle begins again. An eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth. God will take care of the speck in my neighbor’s eye. The more faith I have in Him and His strong voice, the less I have to yell. The more faith I have in Him, the freer my hands become to serve those around me.” I have found the latter to be true.  After experiencing hurt myself, I found personally that the more I was quiet the louder His voice was for me.  It was hard to experience, but I found that letting God defend me was so much better than having my own words defend me.

None of us within the church walls are perfect, even leadership.  Let our first reaction be love towards an imperfect brother or sister and in return allow them to feel safe coming to you by keeping your mouth shut. 
Ok stepping off my soap box…. ;)

The Danger of Seeker Friendly Churches

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As I look around my living room I see a couch that has been passed down through the family, along with a nice table and desk.  I am thankful for family members who blessed us with these items so we could save our money, but I desired change.  This February my husband surprised me by purchasing a couch I have been eying.  After 15 years of marriage I now own my first piece of new furniture.

This change was a blessing for me; unfortunately not all the changes we seek are good.  Attending a church where there is a desire for something new can be dangerous.  Unfortunately within our churches (talking about churches as a whole) there has been a desire for change.  Some Christians desire a change in music, others want to change how a church is defined, or to move away from the church style building. Not all change is bad but unfortunately this desire of change is seeping into the message people hear.  Sometimes pastors bow to the pressure to become more “seeker-friendly” sharing God’s love, but failing to talk about God’s justice and wrath.  When was the last time you heard a sermon on hell?

Sometimes the church’s focus is on numbers, instead of growth.  This is both a failure in leadership and with the church members.  Many of us want to keep up with the “Jones.”  Their church has a coffee shop, why doesn’t ours?  They have a large membership and the pastor is always funny, why do I always feel like God’s is convicting me in mine.  I want to go somewhere fun!

There are some questions I have been personally wrestling with:

  1. Since when did the church’s messages begin to sound more like therapy instead of truth?
  2. Why is it that the same people (church attendees) continue to take similar bible studies over and over?  I am a fan of Beth Moore bible studies, but there has to be a point where you desire to dig deeper.
  3. When a church offers a bible study on doctrine why is it only people ages 65 or older who attend?

There are two passages that have spoke to me lately:

So then, brothers, stand firm and hold to the traditions that you were taught by us, either by our spoken word or by our letter.  2 Thess 2: 15

In this chapter Paul is telling the Thessalonians that false prophets will come and to not be alarmed, and here in vs. 15 he is reminding them again STAND FIRM and hold to traditions.  In other words, don’t water down the message; don’t make it more “seeker-friendly” instead hold on to the ancient and core beliefs of the Christian faith!

Then I read:

2 Tim 3:1-9 this morning and something stuck out that I have not seen before:

But understand this, that in the last days there will come times of difficulty. 2 For people will be lovers of self, lovers of money, proud, arrogant, abusive, disobedient to their parents, ungrateful, unholy, 3 heartless, unappeasable, slanderous, without self-control, brutal, not loving good, 4 treacherous, reckless, swollen with conceit, lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God, 5 having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power. Avoid such people. 6 For among them are those who creep into households and capture weak women, burdened with sins and led astray by various passions, 7 always learning and never able to arrive at a knowledge of the truth. 8 Just as Jannes and Jambres opposed Moses, so these men also oppose the truth, men corrupted in mind and disqualified regarding the faith. 9 But they will not get very far, for their folly will be plain to all, as was that of those two men.

There are people sitting in the church pews that don’t have a firm grasp of God’s truth.  Or that he is the ONLY way.  Instead they are only focusing on receiving a word that makes them feel good about themselves, or having a service that entertains them, or only taking bible studies that don’t make them dig deeper into God’s word.    Please realize that people will not come out denying God’s power, what they will do is water down the message.

If you attend church and you always feel good when you leave, then something is wrong.  A pastor is there for mentoring, support, and like me this last Sunday delivering a message that took me all day to swallow.  I did not like the message, I could ague some of it with him, instead (after I vented to God) I saw the message for what it was….He was being a vessel delivering a message where God was speaking TRUTH.   We as a church body need to hear more messages that speak TRUTH instead of bowing down to being “seeker-friendly.”  Sometimes truth hurts, it makes us uncomfortable, we plain don’t want to hear it, but at the same time it draws us closer to who God is.

My prayer is that churches as a whole do not fall prey to, “having the appearance of godliness, but denying its power.”

Who are the people who have the appearance of godliness?

Church people.

Getting Your House In Order First

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God has been laying something on my heart lately.  I think I know why it is there and it is not for me, so I will share what God has been pressing on my heart to say.

As a high schooler I loved being part of the church high school youth group.  I enjoyed it so much, that when I graduated I turned around and mentored high school girls for a year.  After that year I moved away to college and got married.  Once I moved to Florida I knew I wanted to serve in the church again. I felt satisfaction in helping others and basically because it was fun.

At  my current church, I have helped a bit in the high school group when I first began, then my husband and I taught 3 yr olds for two years, then on my own I moved to helping the middle school when my oldest entered the middle school group, and I also taught two women bible studies.

Yet I was feeling convicted.

At the time I was the strong one spiritually in my family and I knew by volunteering and helping out I was leaving my husband to sit by himself in church or in Sunday school (this applies to husbands who serve also).  I confided in an elderly woman in the church and she gave me some great wisdom. 

I may be lynched with a wet noodle from all pastors and current church administrators

Now I may be lynched with a wet noodle from all pastors and current church administrators, but this wise woman told me, “the church will always need workers and volunteers, but during this season you need to be with your husband.”  She said this in passing, but she does not know what a profound impact it made on me. 

I knew she was right.

God has been laying on my heart to say if you are struggling in your marriage and you both go separate ways Sunday mornings, I would suggest praying to see if God may be telling you to step down until your house is in order.  I am speaking to women here, serving in church is very worthy and WE NEED IT, but if your marriage is on the brink of divorce or things are falling down at home then I would reconsider serving/volunteering, etc…

Please pray and ask the Lord for clarity on where your efforts should be. Church should not be another place where you separate yourself from each other, but should be a place to begin the steps of restoration. (even if it is the other spouses fault for the troubles, ;) )

It may only be for a season, I promise your ministry will be there waiting for you when you return.

Photo by Smile Kerry