He slumps into the car as I pick him up from school. I could tell he was not happy one bit. Middle brother was in the back talking up a storm so I could not interrupt and ask what was wrong. I hear chatter in the back on how “we” have an assignment of finding the best insulator for ice. Notice how all assignments are “we”, instead of “I”. (this picture is how I think of him) Anyways, we arrive home. And I get a chance to ask other brother what was wrong. He said shyly, “there is a girl in my class I like and she has another boyfriend.” My hand grip the steering wheel as my voice ever so sweetly says, “Oh do you know this boy, is he in your class?” “I don’t know his name, but I know who he is,” my son said. I gave him a big hug and told him I loved him, but also reminded him he is too young to have a girlfriend. For right now in your life, Mommy is your only gal. He smiled and gave me a big hug.
Now some of you might be thinking I am talking about my oldest (who is about to turn 13), which I could handle a little better. But NO I am talking about my 8 year old. My baby, my “he will never grow up” son, my “he will never leave his mother and will live near by me always son”.
Please plug your ears as I S. C. R. E. A. M !!!! (Sorry, I feel a little bit better) Ok I am having a hard enough time knowing my baby days are over. I know my 13 year old will seriously begin to really like girls, girls will be calling, and he will send me to the store to buy tons of deodorant. And I will be running back ground checks. But some how while I was not looking, it seemed to skip oldest son and went straight to my youngest. This just breaks my heart on so many levels. My youngest has always since day one wanted to be “the big boy”. He wanted to be like his big brothers, compete like his big brothers, etc.. And as far as sports go, he is my most competitive. He. Does. Not. Like. To. Lose.
But during his whole life I have tried to keep him my little boy. Does anyone else have this with their youngest? How come I am suddenly having this fear, the youngest will move out the day after high school graduation. I have this vision of me with my suitcase, yelling “wait you can’t move you are not old enough, I will come with you”. Ok I am kidding; I do look forward to more time with manly man.
But I want to keep my sons just the age they are right now. I am not dealing with teenage issues yet, they can feed themselves, they can go to the bathroom themselves. Yep, right now for each of them is the perfect age (12, 11, & 8). I think maybe I should declare no more birthday’s in this household. Do you think that would go over with the boys? Nah…me neither.
(This is reality)
My middle son (10) has hit that stage with my oldest (13). Its so hard. My youngest turns 5 this march. Time is flying and I want a pause button darnit. If not a rewind. ((big hugs)) to you because all joking aside I know that little ache in your heart personally :*) xoxo melzie
This was a sweet post. I only have a little toddler, so I’m not at that point yet. Before he was born, however, I was looking through the baby book we got for him and as I was flipping through the school year pages I started crying because I knew my baby was going to grow up.
I already told my husband that he’s going to have to take a vacation day for his first day of school. I’m going to be the blithering idiot.
–Heidi
So Sweet! It is hard to see them grow up. My oldest is 4 and has a little girlfriend. Last year he asked me when she could move in. Now that she was his girlfriend, apparently he thought she should live at our house. I had to explain that under NO CIRCUMSTANCE WHATSOEVER AT ANY AGE DOES YOUR GIRLFRIEND MOVE INTO OUR HOUSE. He had picked out a lovely pink paint color for the spare room which was to become hers. Where do they get this stuff???
It is sweet that he shared those feelings with you. I hope he continues to. They do grow up way too fast!
Oh my, do I understand what you are talking about. My baby is going to be 10 at the end of this month. I am not liking it one little bit. My oldest son is 28 soon to be 29 in February. Were does the time go?
I just wish they’d stay little…most of the time. Sweet post.
Oh my. Welcome to the real world of raising children and all the sad moments that come with it. It seems ridiculous that an eight year old child could be upset over a girl, but it’s reality.
It always has been. And here I am at 56, trying so hard to tell my young friends out here that they truly have no idea how fast time goes by.
One day they’re your babies. The next day, they’re “people” with lives outside the realms of your control.
You know that my daughters are young women with lives of their own now. I’m so proud of them. But I still look at them and ask myself, “When did you stop being my baby and how did that happen?”
Here’s the good news, Laurel Wreath. They grow up and they get lives of their own, but truly, they never stop being your babies and they know that. And that is what gives them the greatest comfort, no matter what. They know they have “Mom,”…..forever.
No matter what life dishes out to them, they know they’ll have “Mom.”
So don’t be sad. It’s just life going on at it’s natural pace.
But I so understand the emotions you’re feeling right now. It’s just hard.
Ok, I am going to confess. When dropping off my oldest for his first day of high school this past September…I cried. Not little tears, but big old rain drop ones. Why? He is my oldest and I have four younger ones to still baby. It was the sudden realization that time does go by so quickly, how could he be going to high school, didn’t I just drop him off at Kindergarten yesterday?
WOW! This is ONLY 5 years away for my oldest? Yikes! LOL A sweet “momma moment” if I’ve ever heard one!
Mine celebrates his 10th birthday next week. Last night he asked me, “Mom, what do I do if there’s a girl I like?” My knee-jerk was to say, “Stop! Right now!”
Reality is I didn’t know what the proper response was. He suggested he might wait until he’s in high school, then ask her on a date.
Okay. We’ll wait. I’m good with waiting. Whew!
I am going through this as well with my youngest. She is turning three on Saturday and knowing that she is my last one is breaking my heart. I cannot have another baby, but just watching her grow and knowing how fast they grow from watching my 10 and 7 year old is making me sad. I think we should declare no more birthdays. We are the moms-we don’t have to give a reason!LOL Blessings!
“And I will be running back ground checks.” LOL!!
I’ve been having these kinds of pangs for a while. My youngest turned 13 and went from elementary school to jr. high this year. Sniff!! It’s funny how when they were really little I looked forward to the empty nest — but the closer I get to it, the less I am looking forward to it. Oh, I’ll plenty to do to keep busy. But I just can’t imagine not missing them every moment.
My son (Issac, age 5–you know that but, never mind, anyway) has had dreams about this house that he is going to someday have, in South Africa, and his friend from church, Julia, is going to be there! He can describe it perfectly, and it is nothing like any house we have ever lived in or any house that we know, and it is in a city–which he has never experienced, but his description is very accurate as to what a house in the city would be like. I am joyful that the Lord has given him something to look forward to–whether it is as it will be or is just a dream, but the fact that he is considering such a sthing at 5 scares me to death. He’s my baby. On the flip side, my best friend in kindergarten through 2nd grade was a boy who I considered my boyfriend, even though my parents did not. He was my first kiss (I kissed him) and I dreamed of growing up and marrying him–which I did not. I can only imagine how my mother must have felt. My Essy is definitely following in my footsteps–her best friend is a son of a fellow homeschooler and a close friend of mine. I have warned her that she is not to kiss him (she shook his hand when he gave her a birthday present) and that she is not to consider marriage to anyone until she is at least 18 and the Lord will show her whom she should marry, if at all.
*sigh. No more babies in this house.
Awww…. how sweet, though- he seems like a sensitive guy, or maybe it’s just the competitive-ness coming out? I can’t imagine, though I know I will be in your position soon enough. I can barely believe my oldest is going to be four, which is nothing on 13…aaaaah!
Oh Laurel – I know exactly what you mean. I clearly remember thinking when my boys were ten and seven “I wish I could freeze them right here.” I just wanted that time to last forever.
They are now 37 and 34. They are still my precious boys, and there are still very precious moments. I think the times I watch them with their own little ones is almost more wonderful than I can bear.
Enjoy these days. They are so precious. But there are precious ones still to come.
Laurel – you are too funny. Well, since we only have one kiddo, who now is 21, got his college degree and has his first real job – I am kind of getting to the point where I don’t want to part from him. He took us for dinner on Monday night (yeah – he paid). It was the most fabulous time we had in a while. Daniel was all chatty, because he has a REAL job…and he is happy – so that makes my Sweetheart and me happy too
…Yeah – we have to let go of them. They have to start their own life – but we can hold on to them as long as possible…
(((hugs)))
3 daughters who are now married with kids of their own.
I never had the empty nest angst. But I angst still because I want to help them make better decisions.
I guess thats one thing a mother always wants to do.
Hard to just put hands in pocket and zip mouth
Well, from one of the childless I think that is a super sweet moment. I have lots of friends with kids, etc. I seem to be the one that they will tell if they have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I think it was super sweet for him to tell you.
Here via the carnival!
That is so cute. When my son (only one) was in daycare, there was a girl who followed him around. He had no interest in her.
He stayed uninterested in girls until 9th grade. Then she broke his heart. For a year or two, he did not seem interested and I longed for a young woman to take interest in him.
This has happened now and it is a good thing. He acts more civilized when she is around.
Aw. Those are painful times for children. It is a shame that they are starting so young. My kids know they aren’t allowed to date until 16. Period. That cuts down on many problems, but the little crushes still come and they are very real to their young hearts.
Oh, poor mum ! Must be awful to have these feelings. Fortunately it was not in my character, when he were baby I wanted him to be a boy, when he were a boy I wanted him to be a man. Now he is a man and I want him to him my baby ! but this time not with such a rush to get him older ! Enjoy every moment, each year is interesting and they will never leave home so quickly.
I have one son only